Acceptance Is the Same of Stuttering is a Matter of Choice
Basic acceptance of reality
- Sun rises in the East
- Life is challenging for everyone
- We are by nature fallible, limited, non-perfectible
- We cannot make demands on universe, others, and even ourselves and expect that these demands will be fulfilled
- But we can strongly desire certain goals and in most probability achieve them or come close
Acceptance of reality about stuttering
- Right now you stutter the way you stutter right now; acknowledge it say london psychotherapy experts
- You can’t demand it to change, but you can strongly desire it to change and work towards changing it
- You can almost instantly realize that stuttering is not awful: 1) it does not cause unbearable pain, 2) you can still enjoy many, many other things
- You can decide not to beat upon yourself (deprecate yourself) for stuttering
- You can think hard and realize that all people have equal worth in the eyes of the universe (we all are born, live, and die).
- Stuttering can’t make you less worthwhile.
- There is no law in the universe that you should not stutter.
- Stuttering causes some discomfort-but you can stand it: you have stood it so far
- In time you can minimize stuttering severity and frequency, but there is no guarantee that you will totally eliminate it.
Acceptance of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) ideas about stuttering
- Stuttering probably has genetic component and a learned component
- With effort and time, the learned part: the forcing, struggling, hard contact blocks, and elongations can be minimized
- With effort and time feelings of inferiority, shame, anxiety, guilt, time urgency, low tolerance of frustration and discomfort, anger at self or others, and the feelings of helplessness/hopelessness, and the avoidances can be radically cut back
- The accessory (secondary) behaviors can be practically eliminated.
Acceptance That You Have a Choice
- You have a choice whether to work on your speech to minimize struggle and unhealthy negative emotions or do nothing.
- You have a choice which approach to use.
- Not learning about the different approaches and not using blood, sweat, and tears to apply a new approach in your self-therapy (if your present one is not working) is a choice. Not doing anything is a choice to remain in the same state of stuttering. You have a right to do so. YOU can live a good life, whether you stutter or not.
- Don’t demonize stuttering
- Don’t awfulize it
- Don’t pull off an “I-can’t-stand-it”
- Don’t deprecate or down yourself because of stuttering
- Stuttering does not make you a child of a lesser god
- Don’t trivialize it
- Accept that stuttering does have its inconveniences
- Humanize stuttering
- Learn to live with your stuttering in daily life until you decide to do something about it